Last year I was so focused on my family, financial, and lifestyle goals that my health and fitness goals took a bit of a back seat. It has taken time for me to shake the shame I was feeling with not training as much and to recognize that life has different seasons.
2018's focus areas were important and will continue to be in 2019 and beyond. My word for 2019 is embodiment. For me, this means fully living through my values and beliefs and taking great care to stay true to myself. It means bringing back some things that are really important to me that I had let slip, and leading by example. It means diving in to doing things I have been saying I want to do for years. It means practicing what I preach.
My monthly commitment check-ins have served to keep me accountable and made the larger goals they support much more manageable. This year, I'm bringing fitness and nutrition back to the centre of my goals and look forward to sharing more with you along the way. Here are some of the commitments I am making to support my goals in 2019:
I'm excited for all that 2019 has in store and can't wait to share some big news with you about my next project!
I'm happy to say that because of the commitments I made (and stuck to) earlier in the year, I lad a strong foundation for navigating the month of December without feeling too overwhelmed or doing things that were in conflict with my own belief system. Here's how it went with my 2018 commitments in December:
No new clothing purchased in 2018 - I am proud to say I made it through the entire year without spending any money on new clothes for myself! Now that we are in a new year, I still feel so used to not shopping that I don't feel compelled to run out and buy something, which is an incredible thing for a girl who used to really enjoy it! This one was such a powerful commitment that I'm working on something for 2019 around this same thing, stay tuned.
Live debt-free - Yeesh it's a challenge to not go crazy with spending on gifts during the holidays! Not because I wanted to buy a ton of gifts, but because I felt somewhat obligated to do so. To help mitigate this pull, we got very intentional leading into the holidays and set up secret Santa's at all of our family gift exchanges which really helped to stay within budget and spend less time shopping and more time together.
Plan ahead for family time - We were well planned in December with a long weekend away just the three of us before getting into the very full calendar we had for our trip to Montreal for the holidays. My "bucket list" helped me focus on doing fun things with my family throughout too!
Do one crossword and read for 10 minutes every night - Did not stick with this one very well in December, however I did finish an entire book in December (one of my "bucket list" items).
This past year has been one filled with learning new perspective, challenging status quo, and making big bold steps to lay a strong foundation for our lives moving forward. I feel armed with a real sense of purpose and a deeper understanding of who I am heading in to 2019. It's going to be a big year!
Thank you so much for reading my words, showing up, and supporting me through this work. I am humbled and grateful to have the opportunities I do.
It was a year of learning new perspectives as I listened to a lot of podcasts and read books on related topics like slowing down, simple living, and budgeting. As a family we really steeped ourselves in the conversation of how we want to live our lives and began to lay plans for the future that align with who we are at our core.
This has meant a lot of reflection on some of my own biases and expectations, and examination of whether or not they fit with who I want to be and what I want to do in this life. I was on maternity leave from my day job for most of the year so there was lots of transition periods and plenty of time for reflection.
It has been interesting and challenging to start to shake some of the expectations that I may have adopted through my family system, the city we live in and the people we surround ourselves with. And I feel more grounded than ever for having begun the work to really establish our own ways of being as a family.
Here are some of the major events and milestones I am celebrating and appreciating for 2018:
This year was so different than 2017 and possibly the biggest difference was dealing with the anxieties associated with being a new parent. So much shifts in such a small period of time and I'm so freaking thankful I have a strong group of women to get me through some of the tougher moments and to celebrate all the small wins along the way. I have really been learning to ask for help and support and it's absolutely been a struggle at times. Even though it had it's challenges, I am proud of who I have been through this last year for myself, my family, friends, and community.
I am still settling in to our life with a kid since returning to my day job, and am more committed than ever to continuing to build a foundation to create life on our terms. I have some big and very exciting things coming in 2019 with MAVEN that I know will add immense value to a lot of lives, and I'm really looking forward to sharing them with you!
With that, I put it out to you:
In 2018, what experiences shaped your life? What intentions did you set out with and honour? What felt really good? What are the moments of joy that stand out? What challenges did you overcome? What are you most proud of?
Take the time, write it down, tell someone. Feel the accomplishment of this year in your life. Acknowledge it as a stone on the path of your journey. Know that it is leading somewhere. Your legacy is happening right now, always.
Make moves in 2019,
Around this time last year, I wrote my first Christmas Vacation "Bucket List". I found it was a great way to put fun with my family and friends at the centre of my holidays and I made more of an effort to put those things on the calendar and make the time to do them.
I have decided to make this an annual tradition and encourage you to do the same! This year, we are headed to Montreal so there's all kinds of opportunity for different activities and people to spend our time with. Some of these items are the same as last year since they are important to me and some I could only do while in La Belle Province! Here's what I want to get up to:
I am so looking forward to these experiences with my loved ones. I hope you all have an incredible holiday season as well!
I'm not sure if it was being off of social media (for the most part) in November that had it feel much more mellow, but it was a relaxing time either way. I wrote a lot more this month - 10 blogs in 10 days, in fact - and it really helped quiet my mind and drop into myself this month.
These monthly check-ins were mostly intended to keep me honest and accountable to my commitments, and I realize now they have also been so key in recognizing how much one can grow from month to month. And it's really incredible what growth you can squeeze into a year. Here's how it's going with my 2018 commitments!
No new clothing purchased in 2018 - Sticking so hard to this one and all those bags of clothes I had in my house last month are now officially gone to consignment!
Live debt-free - November might be the most challenging month for spending with all the hoopla around Black Friday sales and holiday gift shopping. I am proud to say I resisted getting sucked into over-spending. A great strategy we have used for curbing excessive gift buying is doing a secret Santa exchange with our families. One gift, with a spending limit that is comfortable for everyone, makes it easy to stay within a budget and I find it makes the one gift you get far more intentional and special.
Plan ahead for family time - Not only are we headed to Montreal for the holidays, we also have another long weekend on the books for December to hang out as a family before the full schedules of the holidays ramp up. #winning
Do one crossword and read for 10 minutes every night - Whoa did reading fall off last month! I planned to read Brene Brown's new book and ordered it online, and the Canada Post strike totally pushed that deadline back! I just got the book in my hands this week and I'm excited to get into it this month.
We are in the last month of 2018 and it's become a yearly practice of mine to do both a holiday bucket list and an annual personal restrospective. I already have my list started for experiences I want to have this holiday break! These monthly check-ins also help to look back on the year and note my accomplishments and the challenges and will help set the stage for the following year. I'm looking forward to re-reading them when I sit down to write my 2018 retrospective!
I wish you an incredible last month of the year!
With all the holiday and Black Friday ads we are being inundated with this time of year, it struck me the impact and mental space it can take up. The wordplay and marketing tactics are so good at convincing you how much you're saving on your purchases, when in reality, if you are buying anything you are spending. The truth is, you'd be saving 100% if you didn't buy the item at all.
This is likely the first holiday season I will not purchasing any clothing for myself in my adult life. "I spend no money on new clothing for myself in 2018" is one of the commitments I made and have stuck to this year. At first, all the hype around Black Friday had me feeling a little left out. Until I started thinking about the cost of conforming to this season of historically mindless spending on my part.
Many times throughout the year I have been faced with thoughts of how that new cute sweater might make me feel good (temporarily), or how it might even improve the way others perceive me. I have online shopped, added items to my cart, fantasized about how amazing it would be to own them all, and then logged off.
That friction that I have created for myself has been an incredible way for me to recognize my thought patterns and exercise my will. And guess what? There hasn't been a single negative impact on my life. I'm still me, and no one has even noticed that I don't have the newest, most trendy things. I have actually felt less pressure to look a certain way because I committed to this year of not buying new clothes.
I am not against having new clothes, spending or fashion, in fact, in the past, I saw my clothing as a way of self-expressing. I enjoy finding pieces that are comfortable, fit well, and represent a bit of my personality and style. It's when I cross over from hand-selecting things because I find value in them, to falling into buying something trendy because it's the latest hot thing. Often buying that thing to fit in.
What I have realized is fitting in is expensive. Not only in money, but in the far more important resources of time and energy. The time we waste window shopping or browsing a store, and the mental energy we waste on even being concerned with the importance of having the newest cool thing at all.
Additionally, there is the internal energy we expend trying to be like everyone else, instead of bringing our uniqueness to the forefront. I have used shopping and material things as an example here, but my point extends far beyond this. It is a huge expense to not be true to yourself, in all facets of your life.
#themavenlife is all about living with intention and purpose and I know that my approach to the holidays will be shaped by this attitude. I think it's important to give thought and consideration to how we spend our precious resources, this time of year, and always.
I don't believe I was reliant on social media, but I also didn't realize how unconsciously (and frequently) I was reaching for my phone to check my Instagram.
Here are some of the things I have noticed so far:
I may just hop back on social media ahead of my 30-day timeline so that I can communicate important information to my community. And I will be armed with more intentionality around my use of social media. I will likely shift this "Social Media Detox" to creating some boundaries with my phone! Stay tuned!
I have been thinking about all the tools in my toolkit that can go for stretches without being used. I have seen many people seek out a new skill or tool. Often, they learn something new, fail to integrate it into their behaviour, and point the finger of blame at the resource or tool for not getting the job done.
That's like going to Home Depot, buying a shovel, bringing it home and putting it in your garage to collect dust and then blaming Home Depot when your drive way is still covered in snow. You have to actually put the thing to use to experience to desired result. The provider of the resource isn't necessarily where you need to be looking.
We all have life tool kits. Some have more tools than others, but what use are any of them if they never get utilized? When I'm feeling in a rut or complacent, I often seek out a new and flashy thing instead of looking right under my nose at my existing tools. There are some tried and true strategies that I know can support me and bring me back on course with what I want to create in my life.
Doing the actual work is where the magic happens. USE your tools.
I believe in YOU.
The you who knows you have unique gifts you want to share with the world.
The you who wants to use your time here to make a positive impact.
The you who knows you have boundless potential and will do the work to max it out.
The you who is open to learning and growing, forever.
The you who knows the power of choice and exercises it.
The you who wants to create a full life, on your own terms.
The you who wants to experience the magic of life.
I believe in ME.
The me who provides you with tools to identify your unique gifts and help make a plan for you to use them in the world.
The me who knows your time is precious and won't waste it.
The me who holds you capable of doing the things I know you can.
The me who is open to learning and growing alongside you, forever.
The me who can set an example of the power of choice.
The me who can give you tools and coaching to help you create a full life, on your own terms.
The me who creates magical experiences for us.
Each time you bring yourself to one of my offerings, you are investing in yourself, and you are investing in me getting to realize my own goals. So thank YOU.
I believe in us working together to make moves in this life.
If you normally have to have your comforts (coffee, sugary foods, soda, TV, alcohol, pot, cigarettes), you’ll spend a lot of money on them, and in many cases worsen your health and your bank account. You might avoid going places where you can’t get these things, and spend a lot of energy to make sure you could have them every day. But what if you trained your mind to not rely on them for comfort and relaxation? You could slowly get the mind used to not needing these, one at a time, so that it would be free.
Creature comforts? Guilty as charged. It got me thinking about where I have trained my mind to do the things I don't want, instead of sitting with the feeling. Like, how if I am feeling anxious, I will drive way out of my way to spend money on that chai latte when I could have made a tea at home. Or how I know that I could better use my time in the evenings, but I feel tired and put on Netflix instead. Or how just now, I went and browsed other blogs instead of sitting down to write my own. Luckily that last one actually helped inspire me to write, but could have easily been a rabbit hole of distractions.
So for the rest of this week (small doses), my target is to do one task in the evening to better set myself up for the next day (ex. pack a healthy lunch, lay my clothes out for the next day, put the dishes away). Once I have completed the behaviour, I will have some of my favourite dark chocolate (reward).
I invite you to pick one thing for yourself to focus on!